Understand the reasons you are...
Moment of truth. I’ve been there too, not knowing who am I. I tried to get help – to understand me better, to make sense, what I want. I tried many different techniques and approaches that had brought results earlier in my life. After my last exit (which I did for a reason I very well know) I was pretty much lost for too long. I struggled to find answers for moths. Nothing I tried gave me expected results. And voi’la coach was the one who set my mood and helped me to find this 1 key-word that has a fundamental importance in how I define myself. And that one word has made millions of € to my clients already. Simple heh?
Or I could give you another story. It takes us years to make ourselves comfortable in our skin, looking into mirror and getting perfect like reflections from others. Everything seems kind of OK, life is settled. Yet deep down in your soul you are not content, but changing it seems also just as wrong. Why not to extend that well-being for what we have worked so hard?
Well, what is happening? Or more like, what is missing? Why you have this feeling? Heh, it’s not that you are somewhat in unique position. It’s just a sign you don’t dare to, you have forgotten, you feel safe already. Although you know, “it’s” out there. And I can second you here – I’ve been there.
It’s a human nature to protect yourself from unnecessary stress and striving towards impossible goals. It’s totally ok being OK, having enough leisure time, being content with your little boring life. Avoiding fights and keeping off from being constantly on a “survival” mode is probably the major role of our brain. For most of us it works out just fine. But what if you are not ok…?
You are your own greatest enemy
So how does that affect our business achievements in real-life? Being little content average person and happy with it does not reflect any need for achievent, right? How hungry need you really to be to think of taking longer steps, achieving bigger leaps towards uncertainty and unknown? Not so much, right?
Turns out – you are your greatest creation, your biggest fear, your unbeatable enemy. Or not?
Life happens in cycles in addition. So it’s not always so straight-forward to figure out what caused what. Things happen in a longer period and only if we look back then we might find these true reasons what made us think and decide as we did.
I need to give you a credit here. Because you already know, it’s not all. You can do more, better, bigger, longer, higher… But you don’t have to, things are ok already. Wrong.
Fascinated of your brain
Coaching process is pretty much like a game between smart and intelligent minds following specific discipline and set rules that grant great results. What could be more fascinating?
Coach & coachee are usually already experienced people who know it all, but just are unable to look into themselves. Yet other people can see into others very easily. Often there are no people around who would care enough or especially who care, but have no knowledge of coaching techniques and therefore are unable to help figuring out these smart questions that are rotating smart minds. This is where coaches step in to help. Bear in mind that mentoring and coaching are very different disciplines. When mentoring is usually from up to down – sharing experiences, knowledge, wisdom, then coaching is more between even persons looking for resolutions one party sees and other has to understand to make a huge leap. And that leap is what makes coachees great again, as everything is already there, inside coachee!
Role of the Coach
Some say that speaking robot would be a better companion to a coachee. Some prefer human touch and emotions reflections over robots. Anyhow – the things happen for a reason. But not so many people know and appreciate what coaches do. So let’s hit a little light to the coach’s role during sessions. As coaching sessions are anything else like common conversations.
Coach is responsible for creating the secure and trusting environment, watch after the time & the structure of a session. Coach helps to define the goal on each session, reflects misunderstandings and key-points that coachee discovers. Coach summarizes and gives feedback. Coach does not give advice, give opinions nor takes any responsibility to take action for coachee. So in that sense coach is really just the tool that brings out the beauty and essence of coachee discoveries.
I took a coach training finally. Super thankful for CIVITTA, Estonian Business School and EAS for this education in my personal toolbox. I was not aware of the powers what this technique gives. It also made me appreciate coaches who do this work, as financially it makes no sense to spend time to help others understand themselves. Personally I will be using this discipline in my daily work as a very strong cornerstone to achieve impossible goals my clients don’t know how to achieve. The other clear benefit is to understand your management style, to implement right tools to get expected results with lesser expenses on all participants, making the process enjoyable and smooth for everyone. One thing is to be born as a great leader, the other thing to become a great leader by educating yourself. Afterall we all can do it.
Takeaway
- Good education is your endless fuel.
- Everything is possible.
- You are your own greatest enemy.
- Looking out of your “box” TODAY is your responsibility!
- You are “blinded” due to myriad of experiences that made you believe – you can’t.
- Coach takes no responsibility what you do next!
- You decide or not to get the help you need.
